When I was about ten or so my dad built a track and pink "jelly bean" or quarter-midget racer that he stuck me in with a minimum of instruction and said, "Drive!" And I did, resplendent in my matching pink helmet against some real pro kids from Las Vegas. They'd had instruction and some heavy track time, too. I really didn't understand the racing or lapping thing. I just drove like hell to stay ahead of those kids chasing me until I caught up with them. Then I didn't know what to do. Didn't matter anyway, as I dipped a left front wheel over the infield white line and was promptly DQed. Another thing Dad neglected to mention. Such was the extent of my preteen racing career.

I'd been looking for something fun to gift the DH for his birthday and came up a one day high performance driving clinic at Pacific Raceways in Kent, WA. And to make it really fun, I signed up too as a co-driver in our CLK. The school was underwrittern by Barrier Motors and taught by a gaggle of instructors at ProFormance Racing. The August morning dawned more like a late September one, grey and cold, and stayed that way all day with a nice biting breeze. We were ordered to arrive at the track at 7:30 for a light breakfast with class instruction starting at 8:00 a.m. After an hour and a half of classtime, we sallied forth in our cars to do battle with orange plastic cones.

The DH drove first with Mmmmm in the passenger seat. Then I got to drive, which worked out great as I learned from his experience. On the slalom course we aimed the car through the cones at different speeds. A flagman would pop up a flag at some point to signal us to skip a cone. We did great and all cones stayed up right. Then we proceeded to the full ABS stop within the cone area. We accelerated from a dead stop to 60 mph and squeezed the brakes on the moment we passed through the cone gate. On my first go, I got to about 50 and started braking before the gate. The next passes I spooled up and did all just right. As we learned and experienced success, the really great staff of instructor/drivers encouraged us to increase speed a couple of miles an hour. And they always told me to breathe. Said it was underrated and I should try it. Showed me ways to consciously drive and breathe to relax and perform better. It worked.

Back in the classroom we learned about the smooth application of power, braking and steering inputs to keep the car balanced and stable to avoid crashes and get the best performance. Back out to the cars to apply what we learned, followed by a great lunch and Mmmmmm won the big door prize of the day: a paint protector for the car. The rest of the day was spent applying and tuning our newfound driving skills on the two mile Formula 1 track with an instructor riding shotgun. FUN! But very intense, too. We were both exhausted by 5:00 and the drive home. Speaking of the drive home, while at the clinic a young guy driving a C32 AMG kept text messaging and interrupting the start of the debriefs talking on his cell phone. The instructor asked him politely to turn it off. The guy turned his back on the group and said, "But this is work calling." And we waited until he got off the phone. Of course we were all told to turn of phones and really concentrate on the class. Cell phones and driving are a big no no. In any case, the drive home--that guy passed us, weaving in and out of traffic, head bobbing to music, cell phone glued to his ear and way over the speed limit. Maybe the training will kick in eventually . . .

Mmmmmmmmmmm